I have a niggle, something gnawing away at me.  It’s not that important, it won’t change the world.  But it is annoying me.  I have a lovely life on the whole, great family, good friends and what I hope will turn out to be a good job.  I’m a happy, positive person and am always being told how laid back I am.

All that being said I seem unable to ‘enjoy the moment’ to appreciate things as they are happening.  When I need to get something done I am pretty task focused and attack it till the job is finished,  some might say that this is a good quality to have and in some ways it is.  However I seem to miss out on opportunities to connect with people or just to enjoy the thing unfolding in front of me.  I’ll give you an example, many years ago I queued up for a long time to get an autograph (for someone else) from the group ‘James'(oh sit down, oh sit down etc) and when it came to meeting them I was so focused on them writing the message on the damn cd, that I totally missed having chat and banter with them that could have led somewhere, like a great story to tell people.  I came away having completed my task, yay.  But they must have thought, ‘what a dick’, boo.

That’s an extreme example but you get the drift.  I notice it more when in stressful situations like having to ring the bank or  making sure my child doesn’t get left out when meeting Santa.  Get the job done, seems to be my subconscious mantra (Damn’it subconscious, don’t make me come in there).

Am I alone in this???????   I don’t want my kids to grow up adopting this silliness.  I want to be able to embrace things and seize the day, or just being relaxed enough to take part and enjoy.  I know that I’m not worried or scared of these social transactions, could it be a kind of stress or a need to get things done? (don’t want to go to deep here I may open a gate).

This is just the nonsense that niggles me in my more idle moments.

Hope you are all carving out some happiness for yourselves

Love ya

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